I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Randomize
