my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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