Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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