I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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