I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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