i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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