It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
