And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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