Pappa wants mamma naked
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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