after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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