I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
