So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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