I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
