I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
