So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize