I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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