sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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