she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
