I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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