? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
