i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
