Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
i need some magic done to my vagina
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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