You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
