It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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