I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
