Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
