Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize