that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
