just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
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