Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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