My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
