The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
