Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
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