What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
