yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
