I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
There's always time for handjobs
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
