it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
We have so much sex to catch up on
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
