I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
