jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
