how can u be prego again
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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