is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i think my cat just said my name.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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