Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Randomize
