Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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