she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
