I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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