I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
