I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
there is glitter all over my balls
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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