New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
