i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
