3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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